Matthew 19 | The Wolfe Notes

In 2025 we're working our way through the gospels and invite you to join us as we seek to learn from Jesus. Find all our notes, from this year and past years, at the Faith Food tab. And if you'd like ideas for suggested pacing, download our March calendar. Welcome, friends, we're so glad you're journeying with us. Let's grow together!

Our Notes on Matthew 19 include:

1. An Overview: Topic, Themes, and Summary. 
2. An Outline Of our thoughts and questions.
3. Exploration On laying on of hands.
4. A Reflection On value.
5. An Invitation to Respond To God's love.

Matthew 19

Wooden Hearts by Van3ssa_ at Pixabay

Overview

General Topic

What it really means to surrender to the King.

Key Themes

Value. Commitment. Priorities.

Summary

Just as marriage is the process of two souls becoming one, so is choosing God. In a marriage you are expected to give up everyone else when you commit to your spouse. When you commit to God, you are expected to give up everything and everyone else. If you cannot give up everything and follow Him, then you know you are not truly married to Him. A child is ready to willingly follow, and so heaven abounds with them. But you, you struggle to surrender your list of good deeds and accumulation of wealth that prove your worth. You fail to realize that it is by our Father's goodness alone that access to eternal life is granted. What He requires from you is your sincere faithfulness. A marriage where two become one. He knows the cost, and He will repay. What you give up to follow Him will be multiplied in eternity.

Outline

? Denotes a question, * a personal thought, and ! a connection. Researched answers are in italics. *R communicates that in-depth research follows.

On the Value of Marriage (Matthew 19:1-12)

1. While healing people on the other side of the Jordan, Jesus is again approached by Pharisees who attempt to trap Him regarding His views on divorce.
1. ! It's interesting to note that the root of salvation is salve. Salve is used to heal. - Brant Hansen
2. * It stands to reason then, that God would be interested in our physical healing to help us understand spiritual healing.
2. Jesus explained that a man and a woman together become one, so divorce is not allowed because God joined them together. (Read more of our thoughts on God's design for marriage.)
1. ! Read about the original intent in Genesis 2:15-24. 
3. Then, the trap: so why did Moses allow it?
4. Jesus explained it was allowed because of man's sinful nature, but it was never the original intent. If anyone divorces and remarries it is considered adultery, unless the reason for the divorce is adultery. Marrying someone who was once married is also adultery.
1. *The souls became one with another and are now being split again.
2. ! Jesus addresses this same issue in Matthew 5:31-32. There, He adds that if you divorce someone for any other reason than adultery, you make him/her guilty of adultery. 
3. ! Read our Matthew 5 notes for more thoughts on marriage and adultery. Specifically how it relates to our relationship with God.
5. If anyone cannot agree to remain married to one person, it's better not to marry. 
1. ! Paul, an unmarried apostle, echoes this in I Corinthians 7:7-8. Here, he expresses his desire that everyone were to remain single so all of us could keep our focus on God.
2. *You hurt another person if you agree to marry them but don't take the commitment seriously.

On the Value of Children (Matthew 19:13-15)

1. Jesus reminds everyone that children are valued in heaven and took the time to show it. 
1. ? What is the meaning behind laying your hands on someone? Why would Jesus be asked to do it? *R
2. * You hurt children when you don't recognize their value as a uniquely created individual of God's design who is worth your time and attention.

On the Value of Your Efforts (Matthew 19:16-22)

1. Then, everyone was reminded that only God is good and His laws are perfect.
1. ! It's not about checking off a list, it's about your heart.
2. To be complete, we must give up everything and follow Jesus.
1. ! Loosen the grip on your money and possessions so money and possessions can loosen its grip on you. Then, peace reigns where worry used to reside. - Craig McGlassion
2. ? How are riches tied to salvation? *Not tied to, just hard for someone who focuses on acquiring wealth to give up that desire and to seek God first.
3. *You hurt yourself if you give any motivation other than seeking God priority.

On the Value of Faithfulness to God (Matthew 19:23-30)

1. And giving up everything means complete surrender to God, the only salve that truly saves.
2. Peter wonders what they will have, in the end, since they have given up everything to follow Jesus.
3. Jesus responds that the 12 will judge the 12 tribes from thrones in heaven and that everything they have forsaken will be returned one hundred fold in their eternal lives.
4. Many people who are now considered insignificant, will be highly regarded in eternity. The opposite is also true, many who are now highly regarded, will be insignificant in eternity. 
1. *The only meaningful pursuit that has lasting value is following God exclusively.

Exploration

Into the laying on of hands. (Matthew 19:13-15)

Commentary 

• Jesus lovingly demonstrates the children's value. Mark's version of this story says that Jesus "took [the children] up in his arms, put his hands upon them, and blessed [prayed that good would come to] them." Mark 10:13-16 KJV [NLV]
• Tradition. Laying on of hands was a custom of the country. It indicated physical blessing and spiritual gifting.

Verses about Laying on of Hands

• Saul has seen a man called Ananias in a dream. He is to come and put his hands on Saul so he might see again." Acts 9:12 NLV PHYSICAL BLESSING
• Of the doctrine of baptisms, and of laying on of hands, and of resurrection of the dead, and of eternal judgment. Hebrews 6:2 KJV SPIRITUAL BLESSING
• Lay hands suddenly on no man [Do not be in a hurry about choosing a church leader.], neither be a partaker of other men's sins: keep thyself pure. I Timothy 5:22 KJV [NLV] COMMENDATION of SPIRITUAL BLESSING
• For this reason, I ask you to keep using the gift God gave you. It came to you when I laid my hands on you and prayed that God would use you. 2 Timothy 1:6 NLV SPIRITUAL BLESSING
• Israel blesses Joseph's sons by laying his hands on them. Genesis 48:14-16 SPIRITUAL BLESSING

Article Notes

• Confused ritual. Like fasting and anointing with oil, laying on of hands is a commonly confused ritual. All three of these acts are connected with prayer.
• Physical act that enables us to understand a spiritual concept.
• Historical uses: to inflict harm (Genesis 22:12; Exodus 7:4; Nehemiah 13:21); as part of the scapegoat ceremony (Leviticus 16:21); to officially commission (Numbers 8:10; 27:18); by Jesus to heal or bless (Matthew 19:13-15; Mark 8:23; Luke 13:13); by the Apostles who became Jesus' hands to heal (Acts 9:12, 17; Acts 14:3; Acts 19:11); to signal the Spirit's presence (Acts 8:17; 19:6)
• Present day uses: to commission (Acts 6:6; I Timothy 4:14) and commend. Anointing is used in prayers for healing (James 5:14) and hands for blessings (I Timothy 5:22)
• Reasons: It is "a way of making an invisible reality visible, public, and memorable" all of which is a recognition of God's grace.
• Affirms God's calling.
• Provides a strong memory to return to when troubles and doubts arise.
• Pledge of support by the ones who are commissioning.
• Publicly recognizes the individual as a chosen leader of the flock.

*Thoughts: The laying on of hands is a simple gesture that says: "I see you. I value you. I believe you will do great things. You have my seal of approval. When you doubt, remember this moment. I know you. I hold you. I bless you. I choose you. Now, live a bold life of purpose that follows God faithfully."

Jesus RECOGNIZES and AFFIRMS the children by warmly blessing them. This act firmly upends any discriminatory thoughts: These children are of utmost significance. He is telling both the audience then, and us who are reflecting now, that we are responsible for building them up, affirming them, providing them with a sense of divine purpose and unique calling, pledging our support, and publicly recognizing them as important to the flock. We are to protect and support them as they undertake the work God calls them to, and when they struggle, remind of them of their significance to God. 

What's more, we have a lot to learn from these little children. "...Verily I say unto you, Except ye be converted [have a change of heart], and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:3 KJV [NLV]

Sources: 

• "The Laying on of Hands: A Precious (and Misunderstood) Means of Grace Today" by David Mathis at Desiring God
• Matthew 19:15 commentaries at Bible Hub

Reflections

This chapter is all about value: what we value and what God values.

In marriage, we desire companionship, attraction, comradery, and the right to leave if things don't pan out. God's design is that we become one. To accomplish this, we must enter a marriage and commit to never leave. Which is most successfully achieved when we learn to find God in each other. We learn to see His beauty by together enduring pain. God wants us to commit to Him fully, together. 

If we cannot fully commit to becoming one in Christ with our spouse, then we should not marry. Fully committing to God is of primary importance. 

We tend to see children as a pathway to immortality by passing on our legacy, as a demonstration of obedience to tradition or expectation, or as helpers. But God's design is that each child, each soul, is independently and uniquely of immeasurable value. Children are precious. They are worth our time, support, and attention. After all, God wants us to be more like them. How are we to be more like them if we don't spend time with them while seeking to learn from them?

We want people (and God) to commend our efforts, achievements, and accumulation of wealth. We think our accomplishments and goodness will get us into heaven. But God already did all the work required for us, He offers us far better rewards than anything we can acquire on earth, and He alone is good. What God wants from you is your heart. Stop trying to earn your way into heaven. Admit your need and accept His sacrifice.

We seek contentment in people, possessions, and accomplishments for this world. God wants us to find satisfaction in Him alone. He wants us to divorce the things of this world and marry Him, so together we can live in unity. Together we produce fruit that fill the Kingdom. He wants us to recognize that our accomplishments, accumulations, and and associations are not eternal, but the Kingdom of heaven is. You only begin truly living life when you find it in Him. The two of you together will produce exceeding abundantly more than you ever could alone.

Value one another - your spouse, your children, your neighbor, your neighbors' children, because in them you will better understand, relate to, and experience the love of your Savior.

Respond

Connect

God is love. He shows that love through others when we live according to His law.

Reflect

1. Have you ever thought of leaving your spouse? What made you stay? What might happen if every time you see your spouse, you remind yourself that they are a gift from God to teach you how to have a better relationship with Him? What if every time you look in a mirror, you remind yourself that you, too, are a gift from God to be a blessing to others (including that person you're struggling to get along with right now)?
2. In what way have you experienced children as more reflective of God than adults? How do you respond to children when you encounter one unexpectedly? What might happen if every time you encounter a child, you lean in to learn what they can teach you about the Kingdom of heaven? What if each time you made sure to tell that child just how special they are?
3. What is your main motivation in life? What do you work to accumulate: time, money, attention, reputation, etc.? What if when you notice yourself striving to amass worth from anything that is not God, you remind yourself that your only worth is given by Him, everything else is vanity? Then, you remind yourself of His relentless love for you and you find contentment and determine your worth in Him and Him alone.

Act

Arise, and commit to love others, always.

Arise, and learn from a child.

Arise, find contentment and determine your value in God alone.

In Closing

Father God, relationships matter to You. You gave us each other so we can care for, support, and encourage one another. But, to do that, we have to stay committed to one another - even when times get tough. We must not belittle anyone, but instead, approach each relationship with an expectation of understanding You more. You've committed Yourself to us, and ask for us to commit to You, but we turn to other things. You are jealous for us and long for our soul to return to You where it belongs. Teach us to value each other as You value us, to stay committed to each other, as You stay committed to us, and to seek contentment in You and You alone. 

Ready for Matthew 20?

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